My New Camera!! YIPEE!!

My sweet soul mate of 12 years heard me talking about how I would love to take up photography as a new hobby, and how frustrating it is to see a picture in your mind but not be able to get it in a picture. That's the problem with most click and shoot cameras. And really, I'm no pro either, but I confessed that I would LOVE to learn how to use a camera that had different lenses, try my hand at photography and see if I can get the pictures that I see in my head into print. So he hears me say this, maybe twice, (though I've probably said it more than that to other people!) and that maybe for Christmas I could get myself one. (Christmas is always a good excuse for the 'want list.') As you can see from previous posts, my camera sucks!

So Doug comes home one day and hands me a card with this wad of paper in it. I was thinking, "what the heck is this? (sorry, that's the U-tard in me. We use 'heck' a lot.) I unfold it, look at it and see lots of colorful information and pictures, and it still takes me a minute to figure out that he just bought me all the stuff on those sheets! He said he researched it, and asked a couple of photographers what a good beginner professional camera would be, and then he bought it.

I am now the proud owner of a Nikon D40! WOO-HOO!! I cannot wait to get my hands on it! I'm sure it's going to take me a year to figure out all the different gadgets and shutter speeds, and something called 'white balance,' but I cannot wait! Now I suppose I'll have to get Photoshop Elements. Maybe I'll start dropping the hints now!

I'm IM-patiently waiting for it to arrive. Till then, I'm on pins and needles! Hee-Hee!

On another note, since we're having lots of "potty moments" lately, I thought I would share the most recent. I know you all love these moments! LOL! Andon calls me into the bathroom to inform me that he was done going 'poo-poos.' I said "great, let's get you down." He then informs me that I needed to wait and then I could see him concentrating (pushing) very hard. And for all that effort, one little plop could be heard. He looks up at me and says, "the poo-poo is stuck. I can't get it out?" (yes, a question mark, since he's never experienced this phenomenon before. The boy just has great bowels!) I told him that it's okay, it'll come out later. (The things you have to discuss when you have children.) He said, "yeah, but it's stuck behind my brain." Ha-ha, hee-hee, I was so laughing!

Full disclosure seems to be the theme for the week. Brittnee again asked me how babies got IN the tummy. She's aware how they come out, but not how they got in. Nope, just not ready to talk to her about this because a. she's a little too young and b. The rest of the 3rd grade would know by nightfall. Yes, I think it's okay to tell your kids about the birds and the bees (see, I can't even say it)when they're 8, but it really depends on the maturity level of the child. I may just wait and make the school fill her in like I did Teaghan. We did have the discussion though, just not till she was in 5th grade!

My first!

Tonight was my first piano recital!! It brought back such memories of being a kid and playing in recitals, and now I got to do one for my students, my girls'! Unfortunately the pics weren't that great, not your fault Doug, it's just the camera. (Stupid camera!) Anyways, I couldn't be more proud. They all did a great job, and it was so splendidly selfishly wonderful to see the progress each one had made. I can't wait to see them continue to make progress and get better, and to think that I had a little bit to do with that. What a blessing!

Trucking Accident

This is what happened Saturday night. Aren't they lovely pics? Why is it, now that I'm older, when I see blood I get nauseas. Not just sort of pukey, the kind where you just have to sit down, but the kind where you know if you don't find the nearest seat you will pass out. I never used to be this way. I got cut up all the time when I was a kid, especially on a bike. I even had my gums burned off to allow braces to pull my teeth down. Did I get sick? No. Did I feel in the least bit squeamish? Nope. But if one of my kids gets bloody, boy do I get sick. I'll blame it on getting older because there are rides at the amusement parks that I can't seem to ride anymore, i.e. the 'Teacups,' and the like. So when Doug brings in my sweet baby cut up from the road, I lost it. (no, not literally, I did contain my "cookies.")

Here's what happened: Andon was riding in one of the large Tonka trucks that we own, riding it down the drive way. He would sit in the back like it was a chair, and then let gravity propel him down the driveway. I had gone out to see what everyone was up to and I beheld this. I said to Doug something to the effect that this probably wasn't a good idea. I walk back inside the house, and not two minutes later, I hear screaming and Doug walks in carrying Andon. To make a long story short, he'd biffed it on the curb and his face took the fall. He scuffed up his top lip (i've never seen a fat lip as large as he had!), had a bloody nose not only INSIDE but OUTSIDE as well. He forehead was scratched, and even his forearms weren't exempt from the road's assault.

Needless to say, he screamed, Doug cleaned him up, and I got sick. But despite being sick I did have the frame of mind to get pictures. How truly sad am I. But here's the thing, I plan on publishing this on Blurb as a journal of sorts, so I HAD to get pictures. There, that's my excuse. Luckily now he just looks like a four year old with a moustache, reminiscent of Hitler. But I know, wherever I go, people are probably thinking I beat him. They're not far off. JUST KIDDING!!





On another note, yesterday Doug and the kids watched the "Papa Movie" made by my sweet sister-in-law for father's day after we lost Doug's dad. It still makes everyone cry, it's that moving. I thought a year and a half later that it wouldn't affect us so, but it still does. There came up some pictures of the hearse with papa's coffin being loaded and then a picture of the hearse driving away. Andon says, "There's Jesus car!" referring to the hearse. He then says, "Jesus car is SUPER FAST! It brought back memories of when he named the hearse "jesus' car." (See In the Mind of a 4-year old for the story behind this.)

I suppose he'll always think of the hearse as Jesus' car, at least until he's old enough to reason that one out, but I hope that he stays as pure and sweet as he is now. But what I really do hope is that he remembers just a little bit about his Papa that loved him so.

Potty Training 1 year later

Andon just said the funniest thing that I now have to blog. Okay, so I don't HAVE to, I WANT to, cause it's not like I have anything else to do. Picking up the house, getting the kids in jammies, teeth brushed, helping Teaghan make Potatoe Biscuits from Oklahoma for school tomorrow, it's just not as important. I mean really, one has to have priorities. Here's what happened:

Doug and I were looking at flutes for Teaghan on Ebay (Doug's newest obsession- oops HOBBY). Andon comes in to use our bathroom. He's in there for a bit(no.2) and then we hear " Mommy can you wipe me?" I said no, that daddy could do it,(cause that particular item on 'mothers job application' is just not one I relish. And really, Doug's at work all day, he can wipe a butt.) But then daddy said, "no, Andon, you're a big boy. You can wipe yourself." To which there was some whining and then this comment: "But it's too far down there." and then with a whiny voice, "It's too hard!" Daddy replied, "you can do it. You're a big boy." Andon: "I don't want to be a big boy. I want to be a girl."

I don't know what being a girl has to do with not wiping oneself. I suppose he thinks girls are exempt from wiping. Maybe he thinks we've got it easy. But whatever the case, we had a good laugh!

Completely Engrossed

Ever hear of the vampire books? I'm sure you have, you'd have to be living on another planet I suppose to have not. Well, after much tribulation in trying to stay away from those books when everybody raves about them, I caved. Jill plopped the book down in front of me last week and said that I had to read this. I cocked an eyebrow like she was crazy cause there was no way I wanted to. It just didn't seem like something I would get into. So we talked and I discovered that it was the book for book club this month, which I've been wanting to go to for some time now, so I said yes, I'd try it out just so I could say that I hated it. I wanted to be the only one to hate it because EVERYBODY and their cat loves it!

Well, I'm sad to say that I finished the book in one day and called Jill the next morning to see if she had the second! She laughed. I am now about to read the second, thank you Rene, but before I do I have got to get the kids dressed, my kitchen cleaned, teeth brushed, myself showered and dressed so that I don't feel guilty when the book completely absorbs me. Only thing missing is the chocolate, but Jill will probably appreciate not having chocolate fingerprints in her book. Even as I type this I am so anxious to start reading! First I have to drop Andon at Joy School. I wonder where I could take Zak? JUST KIDDDING! He fends for himself fairly nicely. JUST KIDDING!
So I will now add my acclaim to the much heralded vampire series. I suppose that you can write about anything, even vampires, if you're a great writer. The writer's prose is excellent, and you feel like you're really there. The romance between the two main characters is beautiful, yet clean. There's nothing worse than reading a book that you have to skip the next 6 pages because of all the graphic detail, if you know what I mean. I suppose that's just another reason why I like this series. It's clean yet you feel the intimacy between the two. Very good writing!!

"FAST"-idious Genes

Friday, that is...yesterday, we went to a track meet for Teaghan. No, she's not in track, it's just a once a year track meet for 4th through 6th grades among the various schools in the area. They have the options to run the hurdles, the 400m, the mile, the 100m dash, etc. They can choose any and all if they want. Teaghan's team, put together by Kyla, ran the 440m relay. There was the four of them, and if you don't know what the relay is I'll refresh your memory: the one with the baton handoff. Ahh, now you remember. Teaghan was the second runner, and I have to say, we were somewhat surprised how fast she really was. She made up time, even being on the outside lane. She was really booking! All four girls did great, but the other teams were just faster. It was just fun to see them out there with some of the other kids from their school, and they all cheered each other on. Teaghan and her three other friends ran the the 100m, which is just basically a sprint. Teaghan has always been fairly fast, maybe not the fastest in her class, but within the top 5 definitely. However, as she has gotten older, the kids don't really race each other anymore, not like you do when you're 6 and 7, so we weren't really sure how she'd fare in the 100m since we hadn't seen her run in a while. I'll let you watch the video below to find out how she did.

On a side note, having spent 3 hours at the meet yesterday, it got me thinking about how quick I used to be. There was only 1 boy who could beat me in elementary school. His name was Jeremy Griggs. Gosh that boy was fast. It would just kill me that I couldn't beat him, especially when we were usually neck and neck. As I got older, I sort of forgot how fast I was, and really, racing didn't hold a stick next to the plethora of boys in Junior High that I had realized weren't all that icky. I had now officially moved past being a 'child.' (in my mind at least.) Then one day, when I was 16, well maybe 15...or 17, I can't quite remember, my parents and I were talking in the kitchen. I don't remember how the subject came up, but I recall my dad saying how fast he used to be in High School. Now, my dad is 5 foot 8 inches, very broad shouldered and a somewhat stocky fellow, but when he was in High school, he played sports and was in good shape, as you usually are when you're young. He told me of an incident involving another student who thought he could beat my dad. Keep in mind that most of the school knew my dad was fast, but apparently this guy didn't believe it, so he challenges my dad to a race. Dad accepts, and needless to say, Dad wins. "No big shock," says dad. At this point in his narrative the skepticism must have shown on my face because he said to me, "Let's go out to the street right now..you and me, and we'll race." Keep in mind that my dad, at this time, was in his mid 40's and wasn't exactly in the same shape as he was when he was younger. Plus, my dad is ALL torso. He has short legs. I, on the other hand, have long legs, thanks to my mother, and so I thought I had the advantage. In the usual, "I know everything" teenage bliss, I said, "game on!" We exited out the kitchen, went through the garage, and out to the street. I think at this time my mother tried to dissuade me. I thought she just wanted me to spare my father the embarrassment. I was SOOOOO wrong. She wanted to spare ME the embarrassment. We decided on a spot to race too, which was only two houses away, and we ran. I ran my guts out! And then I picked them up and ran some more! And he beat me. That's not even a good adjective. The man annhilated me! He just breezed past me like he was Zeus riding on a cloud.

I have never forgotten this. Even though I was taken down a notch, I couldn't help but admire the man, who at 45, could make a punk 16 year old eat dust. I don't think I was more proud of my dad than at that time.

Needless to say, I'm hoping the gene creeps up into one of my children's double helix. In particular, I think Andon might have inherited Grandpa's DNA. He looks more like my side of the family than Doug's, and I will be thrilled if he inherits Grandpa Lee's quickness. So far, three out of the four kids have exhibited some amount of quickness. Yes, maybe even Zak. Right now I'd say he's the quickest/slipperiest. Since he's a lot like Doug, and Doug ran track in High School, this logic sort of makes sense. So watch Teaghan and find out what place she took.

As you heard, she placed second! She did awesome and she was so proud of herself! She wants to race in Middle School as well, so it'll be interesting to see if she gets even better. Can't wait though! It's such a great feeling when your kids do something well and they feel that sense of achievement. We are so proud of her!

Moral Mirrors

There is no conceivable way that you can be a good mom and be self-centered at the same time. Our kids are our "moral mirrors." (okay, that might be a stretch, but stick with me here.) How does one stay focused on oneself when hearing from ones 4 year old the words that one has said a time or too. (Now I'll break out of the third person.) I was just talking with Elisha today about the words our kids hear us say and then repeat. For example, Andon was asking me to do something, and yes, I admit I did want to sit on my butt a little longer. In my defense, I rarely get to just "butt sit." My butt was grabbing a mere few seconds when he asks me to do something for him. I forget what but I answer, "Just a second."(My standard response. In fact it is such the standard response that I get sighs out of my kids when I use it.) Andon apparently is learning that when he hears the "standard response" he shouldn't like it. It should not be accepted. So he says, "Now mommy." And as an afterthought, cause it usually scores him points, he adds "please?" I said, "Okay. Let me get up and get it." Apparently I was too slow because he adds, "Chop-chop Mommy!" I now know exactly what that sounds like when I say it. So, back to the original premise here: It's hard to take yourself seriously when you have children. If you do, there will be no enjoyment in your life. Besides, this is the stuff that makes life bearable. A good laugh makes everything just a leeeetle bit lighter.

Trauma Drama

I'm writing this post while Zakry sleeps, before the next phone call from Poison Control, and while my comfort food, chocolate sheet cake, is cooking. You're probably thinking "did I read that right? Did she just say Poison Control?" Yup!

Some of you already know, thank you for your phone calls and visit because without you I would right now be thinking I'm the WORST mother in the world. Really though, I still do think that right now. I suppose it's too fresh. But now I need to blog this episode in my life so Zak will know the kindof Trauma Drama he causes his poor mother.

This morning Zak had wanted some fruit snacks and to watch Go Diego Go. I set him up with both and proceeded into my room where the computer is located. I checked my e-mail, bank account, and talked with Melissa on Google Chat. I then had the thought to go check on Zak. Whenever it gets quiet he's usually into or doing something he shouldn't. So I get up and go out to the living room where I see him standing by the couch. As I walk over to him, I see two medicine bottles and my toddler drinking out of the dosage cup. I freak, grab the medicine bottles and realize that he's drank the entire contents of both bottles. Holy Crap! What the.... I wrack my brain trying to figure out how much was in each bottle. One was a benadryl and the other a cold medication. I panic wondering what I should do. My first inclination was to call Doug, which I did, but then realized that really wasn't going to help at this second and so I call 911 who transfers me over to poison control. As I'm on the phone I try to make Zak gag, and as you can imagine he's really not liking that at all and so he clamps his teeth down on my finger. So I give him water hoping to dilute the meds. The poison control guy, Mike (aka my hero) tells me its okay and asks me all these questions. He wanted to know how much Zak weighs and so I'm a madwoman running around trying to find my scale that I just put away yesterday after cleaning my bathroom. But I had no idea what I'd done with it! My brain simply wasn't working. Suffice it to say, Benadryl really isn't that harmful when you weigh 29 pounds and drank half of a bottle. As for the cold medication, that was only a quarter of the bottle. Mike has been calling me every hour and thankfully will continue to do so till Zak wakes up. I have to say though, it is rather nice to have some time to actually get some things done without wondering what he's up to, like blog this ( I know, I'm seriously messed up!) without having to keep one eyeball on him at all times. I'm seriously considering chaining him to the kitchen stove with only a 3 foot radius. That way he can't climb up to the high cupboards and poison himself, or, what he did a month ago, light my toaster on fire. At this point I'm wondering who's going to croak first: me? or him?

Now I'm going to go get my chocolate sheet cake, aka comfort food, out of the oven and devour the whole thing. This trauma is going to cost me 5 pounds, at least.

And what do you know, 'The Poisoned One' just awoke and is fully refreshed after his nap, ready for a new adventure. However his mommy is about to lapse into a coma.

No Secrets in this House!

Doug's birthday is coming up and I got him Guitar Hero III for the Wii. I can write this because it is no surprise to him. I was researching whether to get him GH3 for the Playstation or the Wii, but I didn't know which one he'd want because there were pros and cons for both, so I had to tell him and let him pick which system he wanted it for.
Yesterday I went out and bought it. It's rather long and so I'd left it propped up against the wall in the sack in my room. Andon comes in and asks what it is and I tell him it's a guitar, but it's for daddy for his birthday and not to tell him. I know, he already knew what he was getting, but Doug is known to open his gifts early if he knows they're in the house, and I always cave and let him. This time I want him to wait till it is his actual birthday, so I told Andon to keep it quiet. Who was I kidding. This morning he gets up and the first thing he says to Doug is, "mommy got you a guitar for your birthday." So now Doug knows it's here in the house, and Doug, if you're reading this, don't even ask me to give it to you early. I won't baulk!! And no amount of military tactic will work. Well...maybe jewlery. We'll talk later.

Half- Assedness

Yes people, in reference to the title, some of you may consider that a swear word, I do too, but in this context I am using it as an adjective to describe a state of being. Coleen, you get this, right?
I realize I haven't been posting as religiously as I have been these last couple of months. I think it's because the addictive side of my personality has ebbed and the more practical side has finally kicked in. That's not to say that I don't read all of YOUR blogs, but I just haven't felt inspired lately. It could be a number of things: The first being that I'm just plain tired, the second being that the batteries in my camera died, and the third reason is that when I do something new, I REALLY give it my all till I get burnout. Luckily, I don't feel burned out at this juncture because really this blog is more of my way of journaling than actual entertainment and has been from the very beginning post, but what I'm trying to say is that I am one of those people who do things just a little half assed. Just a little! Although I enjoy blogging too much to give it up, I am trying to discover a happy medium. The other day when I was playing around with some different widgets, I didn't realize that I had spent two and a half hours doing just that! Doug, never the complainer (really!) even commented that perhaps that might be excessive, especially when I had no idea that much time had passed. Is that a problem? I don't see a problem.

So anyway, things have been going systematically as ever. I'm still trying to keep my head above water until my better half is able to contribute again. For those of you who watched conference yesterday, the talk on motherhood was especially good. That whole talk was written for me and I cannot wait to read and re-read it. Ya'll may see some of it in future postings. So for now, until I have something to blog and not all this senseless chit-chat I do, or until I get batteries for my camera, this will have to suffice. But if my children's battery operated toys that they haven't been able to play with for a year is any indication, it may be awhile.

Orange Chicken

Warning! If you like this chicken, disregard this post.
Life as a stay at home mom most days dips into the mundane and the routine, all of which children crave. And really, I've started to see the blessings in the routine of the day because it means nothing disastrous has occurred. A disguised blessing, if you will. I pick up the same toys day after day, I do the same dishes day after day, I wipe the same butt day after day (yes, my 4 year old is still having me do this, and honestly I'd rather not wage that war right now), I help with the same homework, you see where I'm going with this. If you're like me, a "treat" every now and then does wonders for one's morale, especially when so much of what we do goes unappreciated. So today I was running around gathering birthday presents for the birthday parties that my girls are going to tomorrow. To give credit where credit is due, the boys were not all that bad today in Michaels. Knock on wood. I decided to take them to the library but when I got there it didn't open for a half hour. So we hung out. All is going well. Really! So I'm feeling pretty darn happy that the boys are being good and then I start thinking about lunch, because after we had finished with the library it was 12:30. My first thought was to pick up something, but we did that yesterday when we were out, and frankly it's just not that healthy. But I didn't want just a pb&j, I wanted something yummy! Here's how it works for me: I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm sad. And no, that does not mean that I'm sad more than I'm happy just cause I'm thin. I know some of you were adding that one up! Rest assured, I love food way to much to give it up. I credit genes and a fast metabolism. Anyway, I'm trying to plan out a lunch menu in my head while getting the boys buckled into the car and I realize that I bought this orange chicken from Costco last week. I love orange chicken! I decide that that's what I'll have for lunch! I'll get the boys a pb&j, cause they love those, and I'll enjoy my orange chicken and not have to share. Anytime I don't have to share puts me on cloud nine. I take the package out of the freezer and I notice that there's two packs! Well, great, I think, I'll be able to save it for another time! Double whammie- the day just keeps getting better!
As I'm putting the chicken on the cookie sheet I realize that it doesn't look as appetizing as I'd like, but whatever, I'm sure it will be good, and besides, I'm still thinking "I don't have to share!" I know that's rotten, but it is such a treat to not have to share EVERYTHING!
The timer goes off, I add the glaze and honestly, it's not looking too bad. It doesn't smell as good as I'd imagined it would smell, but I'm sure it will be good. The boys are tucked away with their sandwiches, juice boxes, and Cheetos (I know, the nutritional value is not real high here, and we probably could have eaten out and had the same amount of calories) and I sat down with my Orange chicken, and took the first bite.
It was not good....(sigh)not good at all. What a disappointment! I really am so sad about the orange chicken! Too much hype I suppose. So I ended up sharing with Teaghan and her friend because they're the only ones who would eat it.
Moral of the story, don't use food as an upper. It can damage ones psyche.


See, it doesn't even look appetizing from the picture, and that's not because I take bad pictures!

One of THOSE days!

Yesterday was one of those days when I would literally give my I-teeth to go back in time 10 years. Well, maybe just 5. Yep you guessesd it: the 5 year mark would be right before Andon and Zak were even thoughts. But even though I wish it today, my life would be empty without them tomorrow. At least the lessons I've learned from them about myself would've been forever missing without the dynamic duo.
Looking back at the mother that I was with the girls, and the mother I am now, I find two distinct differences. Number one, I actually thought I was a good mom, you know, one that had it all under control. And maybe back then I might have, but only because the girls were so much EASIER than the boys. Number two, and this one is hardest to admit because now I have to acknowledge the snob in me, is that since the girls were easier I often looked at other people with whiny kids or ones that threw temper tantrums the whole time in the store and thought, "why is that kid so whiny? Doesn't his mother know how to calm him?" You know the ones. You see the poor mother in the produce section and the kid is throwing a major fit, worthy of an Emmy. Next you see this poor woman in the pasta aisle, same kid, same Emmy fit. Next, the bread aisle.... you see where I'm going with this? Her whole shopping experience that takes at least an hour is filled with cranky child. That's the worst possible situation. But here's what I would think: First I would always have empathy, but the thought that would run a close second would be, "Someone needs to show her how to discipline so that child knows he can't get away with that. He needs to know that he can't talk to his mother that way." Now I know this sounds very pious and all, but in my defense I really did feel bad for her. During this period when my girls were little, they did throw the occasional tantrum in public, but they were easily controlled. Where am I going with this you ask? I'll tell you. Heavenly Father, in all his wonderful wisdom, saw fit to teach me about what compassion REALLY is. Not the kind where you feel sorry for someone but walk on by, but the kind where you stop and try to help out. My boys have taught me this. I am now the mother in the store with not only ONE screaming, whining child, but TWO! TWO!!! I am the one all the other shoppers are trying to avoid. During such times, (and it really is EVERY time I'm in the store with them!) I want to stash the shopping cart and run to Fiji. Yes, if it was possible, I would RUN. I would be running so fast that I would be able to run on top of the water. This is how desperately I want out of the situation. I have now turned into the mother that the other mother with the perfect toddler (which I used to have) is wondering if I'M in need of some parenting classes. At this juncture, a resounding, echoing, YES! would be in order.

Some good has come out of being humbled. I now have REAL LIFE empathy for mom's who battle children in the store, because they're just doing the best they know how to do. It's just a difficult child and some are just harder than others. I no longer walk on by, afraid to intervene. I at least will stop and try to give the child another focus. Usually it's a who's this crazy lady look. But it usually does the trick. But here's hoping that my boys mellow with age, because I don't think I could handle any more hard knock lessons coming my way. One day my kids may receive a postcard from Fiji!

My Epiphany

So I had no internet Saturday and Sunday, and can I just say how absolutely HORRIBLE that was? You know you have a problem when you panic because you can't get on. Okay, maybe I didn't actually panic, but I was definitely annoyed. I couldn't check my blog, and more importantly I couldn't blog stalk. To my utter joy the internet was working this morning, so my world is now at peace.

Now I can tell you of my epiphany of sorts last night. (This is what happens when there is no internet. One actually has to think. I know, the horror.) I don't recall the thought process leading up to my epiphany, but I was in that state between awake and asleep. I was reminiscing and thinking of the things I've accomplished and the things I've yet to do in my life. The way I've always thought about myself has been in two parts: one being me-myself-and I, the woman; the other being as a mom. The two parts, in my mind, never mixed. They were two separate individuals. And I think a part of me has always wanted to put the Woman before the kids, or at least view that part of myself as more important than being a mom. Maybe that's the world's perspective, I don't know. The thing is, I've always put my kids first, but felt slightly guilty for it when really, should I have been focusing more on myself? If I make a better me, that will make me a better mom, right? And that makes some sense, but it's all about balance. Here comes the epiphany moment: I realized that the things I learned and continue to learn as a mother have made me a better woman. The many hats we don everyday for the different needs of our children actually make us into more well rounded individuals. I know that I have more empathy for a mother who is wrestling 4 children in the grocery store all for the sake of getting a couple of items. (See my crazy life story.) I don't see the world in the same view as I did before kids. There is my pre-children life, and my post-children life, and by far the life that I have after kids is far better than the one I had before. Selfishness cannot exist when you have children. You've never felt real, true love till you hold that baby in your arms for the first time. You never knew you could be a stand up comedian till you play with your kids. You didn't know what true sacrifice was till you were asked to give the last cookie to your toddler.(Okay, that might be stretching, but ya'll know what I mean.) Patience is not truly earned until you go through potty training. You don't think your heart could be so full or break so hard until you have kids. You don't realize what a great story teller you are until you're asked to read a book 10 times in a row and you have to embellish the story just to keep your eyes open so that you can read it an 11th time. You don't realize how amazing and wonderful the world really is until you see it for the first time through your child's eyes. Disneyland becomes a grand adventure when you take your children. You cry when your daughter's heart is broken because you feel as if yours just broke too. The things your children go through are the same things you yourself went through, but somehow when it's your child, you feel it much deeper.
Everything changes and you change too. The mundane, sometimes monotonous things we do as mothers actually make us better women. I no longer see my job as a mom as a job, but as a learning experience. Yes, it's still a job in the sense that it is work, but motherhood is not just to be endured till it's over, but lived to its extreme. There is something to be learned in the highs and the lows of everyday life. So if any of you have debated this very dilemma, just remember that the things we learn as mothers actually mold us into becomming better women.
Thanks for letting me wax poetic for a moment. Every now and then I need to write these thoughts down as they come. Thoughts don't come easily you know! Just kidding.

The Main Reason I Blog

You should continue on in this important work of recording the things you do, the things you say, the things you think, to be in accordance with the instructions of the Lord. Your story should be written now while it is fresh and while the true details are available.

Your private journal should record the way you face up to challenges that beset you. Do not suppose life changes so much that your experiences will not be interesting to your posterity. Experiences of work, relations with people, and an awareness of the rightness and wrongness of actions will always be relevant. Your journal, like most others, will tell of problems as old as the world and how you dealt with them.

What could you do better for your children and your children’s children than to record the story of your life, your triumphs over adversity, your recovery after a fall, your progress when all seemed black, your rejoicing when you had finally achieved? Some of what you write may be humdrum dates and places, but there will also be rich passages that will be quoted by your posterity. President Spencer W. Kimball


I realize that a blog is not exactly private, but I hope to be as real as possible. Since I'm not a great journaler (is that a word?) my intention is to use this blog as a journal of sorts, to record the ups and downs of my life and our family life, so that my children will be able to read it and hopefully enjoy it. Maybe, just maybe, they'll be able to catch a glimpse of their mother, not just as their mother, but as a woman just trying to do the best that she knows how to do. (See my Blurb link above.)

Blogging is Good for You

I went to Teaghan's music class today. It was so fun to hear them all play together. She's on first bench now, the third chair in and she's so excited. (She's the one wearing pink.) We think there's a definite talent for music. That being said, we told her that she had to continue with the flute in middle school. She wanted to take art because she views herself as quite the artist, and she is very good, but in middle school she has to pick either art class or music class next year, and since the music teacher at the middle school is supposed to be amazing, we told her she had to stick with the flute. Harsh, I know. But we're her parents and that's our job. She'll thank us later, right?

I know I've said that I wasn't going to blog everyday, but it's turning out to be just that. It's just that I suddenly see all the funny things the kids do, and the not so funny as well, and all of it is good. Blogging has really made me count my blessings and realize that life is full of ups and downs, and that's what makes it great! I'm not too crazy about the mountains per se, but the hills I see in a different light. See, blogging is good for you- it's like eating your Wheaties.

This is a picture of Zak with the potty seat on his head. See, normally I would just say, "ooooh, get that off your head," and then haul him directly into the tub to shampoo his hair. (yes, I am that anal.) But not this time. I took a picture first and then put the potty seat away. He'll come to love that potty seat in July when he turns 3. The magical number 3, for that is when he is getting potty trained. No more diapers! I know you can't hear me, but I am now singing, 'Oh, Happy Day.'


On another note, any guesses as to what this is? I opened the door to let the boys out into the backyard, (well, really it's just a mass of weeds in lieu of grass), and as I glance down I notice something behind the curtains. I leaned in closer to try and figure out what it was.




Yep, it's a pancake. A PANCAKE!! Needless to say the culprit is one of two people. I guess my pest control is working really well because who knows how long those pancakes have been there- and no ants!